Transcript for

Episode 108:

What to look for in a healthy spinning community

If you're part of a spinning community, is it a healthy one? How can you be sure?

Hello there darling Sheepspotter! Welcome to episode 108 of The Sheepspot Podcast. I'm Sasha, my job is to help you make more yarns you love, and in this episode we're talking about what makes for a good, productive, fun spinning community.

Way more often than I would like, one of my students tells me about a negative experience they've had, usually when they were new spinners, with other spinners, in which they were made to feel bad about their spinning or their wheel, or in which they just didn't feel welcome.

In general, I've found spinners to be very welcoming, but spinners are humans humaning, and that means of course that things between us can sometimes go badly. When we get together in groups, we can fall into patterns of relating to one another that aren't healthy, by which I mean just that they make us feel bad. Remember, your spinning has one job, and it's to make you happy. If it's not doing its job, something needs to change. And sometimes what needs to change is the people we spin with.

So today, I want to talk about some features of healthy spinning communities, and what to look for in spinning communities that you're part of or are considering joining.

Covenant

The first feature I want to talk about is covenant.

One of the most important spiritual and intellectual gifts I've been given by my faith, Unitarian Universalism, is the notion of "covenant." UUs like to say that we are a covenantal religion but not a creedal one. That is, we don't have to believe the same things, but we do have to agree about how we are going to be together and then do our best to live up to those agreements.

A covenant, in this sense, is an explicit set of rules that governs relationships between people. UUs create covenants both at the congregational level and within smaller groups like committees or teams. In fact, when you start working with a group of UUs on something, creating the covenant is usually the first thing on the agenda of the first meeting.

I find this practice to be really moving and also really practical, because it's a moment in which we all have to think about how we want (and don't want) to be together, and in which whatever we decide about that is documented. If someone breaks the covenant, everyone understands that there needs to be a process to address harm and restore, if possible, the relationships between the people involved. That process can be painful, but it can also be really healing.

So my first piece of advice is to look for spinning communities in which there's a clear understanding of what the group is for, what it's going to do together, and what's in and out of bounds. The more explicit that understanding is, the better. In my community, The Guild, some of our rules are "be supportive," "be constructive," and "don't be a jerk." And I'm prepared to protect the community by insisting that those basic rules are followed.

Positivity

The second feature to look for in spinning communities is positivity.

"Be supportive," "be constructive," and "don't be a jerk" are all ways of saying that The Guild is a community in which we value positivity. I don't mean "toxic positivity." No one in The Guild is going to tell you to look on the bright side if you're depressed or your spouse has died suddenly or you've just gotten a terrible diagnosis. But in general, we stay focused on spinning and on supporting and encouraging each other; on what's right about what we make rather than on what's wrong. And when folks ask for feedback, the group is really good at responding respectfully and constructively.

When a community values positivity, members are more likely to feel safe being themselves and sharing their work. As a result, they build trust and connect with each other more deeply. Valuing positivity also means zero tolerance when it comes to gossip, bullying, or any kind of abusive behavior. That should go without saying, but alas it does not.

Value

Finally, the third feature to look for is value.

Is the community actually providing whatever it was you were looking for when you joined the group? This question assumes, of course, that you know what you were looking for.

We humans generally don't make a move unless we're trying to solve a problem or address a need. So what's the problem you're trying to solve in joining the group? What need are you trying to address? Having clarity on the answers to these questions will in turn help you get clear on whether you've found what you're looking for.

Maybe you want accountability from the community to spin regularly. Or challenges that will keep you learning and growing. Maybe you're looking for a place to ask questions when you get stuck. Or a set of friends whose eyes won't glaze over when you start talking about yarn. Maybe you want to mentor and share your knowledge with newer spinners. Or maybe you're in search of a spinning mentor. Whatever it is, know what it is, and pay attention to whether you're getting it.

I want to close by urging you to pay attention, as well, to the value you're bringing to the community. Are you participating in ways that support the goals of others in the group? Because a community in which you're getting what you need and helping others to do the same is a healthy community.

I really hope that this episode has given you some food for thought on the topic of community, and on the importance of covenant, positivity, and value within spinning communities.

I would love to hear about the spinning communities that you're a part of, whether that's to spin together socially, or whether to learn together. What if anything are you seeking in a spinning community? Come on over to The Flock and tell me.

You'll find a thread in The Flock, Sheepspot's free online community for inquisitive handspinners, where you can discuss and comment on this episode. You'll find a link right to the thread in the description of this episode inside your podcast app. Click it, head over to The Flock, and join the discussion. I really do want to hear from you.

And don't forget that the podcast episodes are now searchable by keyword, and I've also curated some playlists of episodes on particular topics: there's a playlist on spinning fundamentals, one on wool and breed study, one on spinning for socks, and more. Just head over to Sheepspot's website at sheepspot.com and choose "podcast" in the navigation menu; scroll down a bit and you'll find the link. And while you're there, have a look at the new website and check out our merch!

That's it for me this week, darling Sheepspotter. Thank you so much for listening! I'll be back next time with an episode on community as a source of inspiration. In the meantime, take a little time out and spin something. You know it will do you good.